Embarrassment can be a difficult feeling to deal with. It can make you feel like you are being judged, even when the other people around you don’t care.
If you embarrass yourself in front of your crush, it can be hard not to take it personally. But there are a few things that you can do to help ease the embarrassment.
1. Take a deep breath
If you’re feeling flustered, taking a few deep breaths can help calm your nerves. It will also remind you that this is just a normal part of life, and embarrassing moments happen to everyone.
You may find it helpful to write down what you were doing at the time of the embarrassment and how you felt about it. This can be a helpful way to understand how your anxiety is connected to particular situations and to learn what triggers it.
Some people who have a severe case of embarrassment may benefit from “constructive embarrassment” exercises, which involve purposefully putting yourself in situations where you will feel embarrassed. This is similar to the concept of carrying out exposures during CBT, and it can help you overcome your fear of embarrassment.
2. Tell yourself that it wasn’t that bad
If you’re having a hard time getting past an embarrassing moment, try to remind yourself that everyone has embarrassment moments. It might help to talk about it with a trusted friend or family member, and hear their take on the situation.
Embarrassment can be a sign of social anxiety. If it’s limiting your life and making you avoid situations, talk to a mental health professional for treatment options.
Sometimes, an embarrassing mistake can be turned into a funny story. Whether you split your pants or fell in the mud, telling a good joke about it can help you get over the incident and maybe even make some new friends. Just remember to play it off in a lighthearted way, as embarrassing things can make people uncomfortable.
3. Do something to distract yourself
If you find yourself ruminating over an embarrassing moment, it might help to do something that will distract your mind. You could try reading, exercising, taking a walk, or listening to music. Doing something like this will prevent you from thinking about the embarrassing incident.
If possible, try to make a joke about your embarrassment. This will not only make you feel better, but it will also allow other people to see that embarrassment is a normal part of life.
You may also want to consider talking about your embarrassing moment with a trusted friend or therapist. This can be a great way to process your feelings and learn how to deal with them in the future.
4. Take a lesson from it
The best way to handle embarrassment is by learning from it. For example, if you trip and fall in front of her, avoid wearing high heels next time. This will prevent you from embarrassing yourself again. Also, try to stay calm and not make a scene out of it. If you can take it with grace, she will think you’re more mature and sophisticated.
Another great way to learn how to deal with embarrassment is by practicing it on purpose. This technique is called “constructive embarrassment,” and it is similar to exposure therapy in cognitive-behavioral therapy. In this podcast episode from Very Well Mind, LCSW Amy Morin shares her tips on how to do constructive embarrassment.
5. Make a joke about it
Using humor to handle embarrassing situations is a great way to change your mindset and take yourself a little less seriously. However, be careful not to make jokes that hurt others or are in poor taste.
If you find yourself getting embarrassed frequently, it might be helpful to talk about it with a friend or therapist. This can help you understand why it’s happening and how to stop it from occurring in the future.
You could even practice intentionally embarrassing yourself on purpose to learn how to cope with it. For example, you could bring your swimsuit edition of Sports Illustrated to school to impress your crush and watch it get confiscated. Or you could write a note that says “roses are red, violets are blue, and so am I” in your science class and turn bright red when the teacher finds it.